


no way we'll ever look back

by Lauren (notalwaysweak)



Category: The Big Bang Theory (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-07
Updated: 2014-09-07
Packaged: 2018-02-16 11:44:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 873
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2268471
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/notalwaysweak/pseuds/Lauren
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tumblr ship AUs meme: Two miserable people meeting at a wedding (Stuart/Raj edition).</p>
            </blockquote>





	no way we'll ever look back

**Author's Note:**

  * For [diacritical](https://archiveofourown.org/users/diacritical/gifts).



> Originally posted on [Tumblr](http://notalwaysweak.tumblr.com/post/96841774888/22-39-and-or-50).
> 
> Not mine, just borrowing.
> 
> * * *

“I hear Amy bribed Leonard to throw the garter straight to Sheldon,” Raj says in a pretty poor attempt at a light conversational tone.

Stuart looks up from his plate, where he’s drawing aimless doodles in the smear of whipped cream and chocolate that was a slice of wedding mud cake five minutes ago. Leonard still has cream on his nose from the cake-in-the-face moment of hilarity. Penny wipes it off with her finger and sticks her finger in her mouth and half a dozen phone camera flashes go off simultaneously.

“Why bother… I mean, we all know they’re going to be next anyway…”

“You never know. You and I might get lucky.”

Stuart gives Raj a severe side-eye. “As in together, or individually?”

Raj laughs and shrugs. “Either or…”

“I’m sitting on the singles table and you’re up there with the bridal party. I don’t think I’m the one who’s going to get anywhere.”

All the other chairs are currently empty, because Leslie Winkle has started a fight (mostly verbal. Mostly.) with Barry Kripke over some obscure point of physics, and they’ve taken it to the foyer to be polite. Everyone else has hit the dance floor; the band is playing something that sounds suspiciously like a brass variation on the Macarena. Raj drops into Leslie’s seat and starts fiddling with her placecard.

“Yeah, except that everyone else is paired off up there. Penny and Leonard. Howard and Bernadette. Sheldon and Amy. If you think I’m even going to get a pity  _hug_ from Leonard’s sister, you’re wrong. She knows she’s just there to make up the numbers.”

It’s Stuart’s turn to shrug. “She could have said no.”

“And leave the bridal party unbalanced?” Raj starts building a tower out of the placecards. “I guess we could have put you in the dress. You’d look cute in pink.”

“I’m not sure sleeveless is really my look.”

*

Leonard’s aim is horrendous.

The garter hits Raj square in the chest and he hastily hands it off to Sheldon, who holds it between two fingers like a particularly objectionable cockroach.

Penny’s aim is better and the bouquet soars straight into Amy’s hands.

“I thought it was meant to be  _single_  ladies, not practically married, been dating for years ladies,” Leslie says to Stuart. There’s a bruise on her cheek but she’s got a cheerful smile. Across the room, Kripke is nursing a black eye.

“I guess any rule can get broken with a big enough bribe,” Stuart says, privately very glad that he isn’t a scientist.

“How come you’re not up there? I thought you were pretty good friends with—” Leslie looks like she’s trying to figure out which name will have the fewest implications. Or the most. “—all of them?”

Stuart’s shoulders are getting a workout from all the shrugging. “Yeah, well, pink doesn’t suit me.”

Leslie snickers, and then wanders off again to punch someone else, maybe. Stuart doesn’t care as long as it’s not him.

*

He’s planning to sneak out early, but Raj catches him.

“Where do you think you’re going?”

“Home.” Which, at the moment, is still Howard’s old bedroom.

“No. You have to stay and be lonely and unfulfilled with me.”

“Come  _on_ , Raj. Leslie’s slept with Leonard and Howard.” (He knows this because Leslie does not have a brain to mouth filter.) “She’s probably dying to make you number three out of the Fantastic Four.”

“Am I Mr. Fantastic?”

“No. You’re Sue Storm.” Stuart surveys the room. Everyone is talking, laughing, dancing… everyone but them. “I think we both are.”

Raj sighs so hard he blows over the placecard tower.

*

The end of the night feels like the end of a work day at the comic book store: other people’s mess strewn everywhere, the feeling that there’s just so much  _more_  to do before he can go to sleep. At least he doesn’t have to clean up. The staff of the reception center can do that, although they don’t look especially thrilled about it either.

Raj catches him again outside as Stuart’s debating calling a cab or walking up the street to check the bus timetable.

“Do you want a lift?”

“How drunk are you?” Stuart asks.

By way of an answer, Raj leans in close and exhales softly. His breath smells like chocolate cake and faintly of wine, and it’s warm, and his mouth is  _so_  close to Stuart’s.

“Okay?”

“I’m not a breathalyzer, Jesus.”

Raj steps right up to him; Stuart can feel his body heat. “I’m sober enough to drive, but…”

“What?”

“I’m drunk enough to think this could work.”

Stuart’s about to ask  _what_  again, but then Raj’s mouth is on his instead of just his breath and he can’t talk. Raj’s arms go around his shoulders. Stuart’s paralyzed for a long moment and Raj almost pulls away, but then Stuart remembers how to move and slips his arms around Raj’s waist, tucking in under his suit jacket, fingers running over the satin of his cummerbund.

One of Raj’s hands finds his, slipping something around his wrist and twisting it. Stuart can feel elastic and rough lace.

“Penny’s garter?” he asks against Raj’s lips.

“I  _did_  catch it,” Raj says defensively, and Stuart starts laughing.


End file.
